I cockslap morals
does the new i-phone have a pregnancy test app?
look for us when you get to the club. we're the guys wearing snorkels.
In all seriousness...vodka, almond milk and chocolate syrup make a decent white russian.
EARTHQUAKE STATUS DRINKING GAME
Maybe it's the vicodin, but all I wanna do is hunt wild hogs.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
I vaguely remember Matt shouting something about "GET ON MY LEVEL!" at the bartender before he attempted to order a case of tequila from him.
There is someone hissing in the hallway. Not even a typo. Not pissing. Hissing. Like a large cat. Or a komodo dragon.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
HIS DICK ISNT BIG ENOUGH FOR HIM TO BE THAT PROUD OKAY
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
I'm looking for whatever I can find, and afford without having to eat my emotional support cat
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Randomize
