fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
He's hinting that I'm starting to be kicked out of their blunt rides, I can feel it.
Pregaming before going to drink with a girl from Russia. Please make sure I'm not dead in the morning.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Hangover or death. Death. I'll have a slice of death please.
She asked if I wanted to "Mormon Motorboat" her, which I guess is just motor-boating her through her cloths. Turns out I did.
First of all guys don't have walks of shame. Secondly there is nothing more epic than riding the skytrain in a toga while everyone else is going to work
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
I would also like you to tell your human bio class that I successfully smoked out the flu. 103 degree when I woke up yesterday. 100degree after one bowl. 4 more bowls and 16 hours later all that's left is a cough
all im saying is 27 is too old to still be drinking 40s, you make more money than me, buy some decent shit
screw you you golddigging beer snob
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