PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
Questioning the dried heart shaped nutella on my boobs. Valentines day has begun.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
Wait. Wine + Crossbow..?
Its like her house is inhabited by 50 year old lesbian water color artists with a throw pillow fetish
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found out that order of 30 Beefy 5-Layers last weekend has achieved legendary status among the Taco Bell employees. Is there a Stoner Achievement for that?
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
Remind me to tell you how I've been deaf since Sunday at 1245
She asked me to come on her OkCupid date with her
I was drunk and gave him my dad's phone number instead because somehow I thought that'd be funny. Man did that fucking backfire
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
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