I am going to invent a chocolate mix for sperm.
Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
he thought i was a dude.
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
Still not exactly sure how i unbolted your toilet from the ground.
put me on a leash or i'm going to fuck someone
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Once again being low on toilet paper is forcing us into another round of our favorite game - toilet paper roulette - where there can only be 1 winner. Maybe.
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
I told myself I'd stop after three shots of fireball. Haha HA hA.
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
worse hangover than the time you almost threw up in a plant in front of your daycare kids?
...I don't remember telling you about that but yes
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
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