i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
I think i can make this amish girl legitimately hot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was supposed to take me to a nice dinner, but istead all he did was get drunk and throw lit fireworks at me.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
Things I had in my bed when I woke up: an avocado, a toilet brush, and a note that says thanks but no thanks with the number of taco bell on it. WHAT DID I DRINK?
do you know how much drugs we can buy now that you got that raise at work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I guess? According to Jeff his mom is wondering when the grand babies will arrive. So I don't think they like ME so much as my supposed functioning uterus
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
She was riding me and giving me score updates to the basketball game at the same time..... Shes a keeper
I took a picture of you last night while you were drunk, trying to smoke a bowl through your nose. It's now your contact id.
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