i swear to god her finding her clit was like looking for a sock in a dryer full of beach towels
HAH. HARRY POTTER CASUAL CONVO HAS BEEN EXTENDED TO DISCUSSING WEATHER. SO PRO
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
Just so we're on the same page, we cannot have been the first people to have ever thought about shooting that guy with crossbow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was completely serious when he said my boobs were like "majestic white clouds."
I left puerto rico a week ago and my vagina still smells like coconut.
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
I'm pretty sure they changed the plants at the grocery store because of us
you're being fucking weird and i don't like it. text me when you're not being the after picture on a poster for rehab
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
I have an epic ass bruise from a wheel tonight and I am drunk now because I decided vodka heals all wounds.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
I mean I faked it but he could answer my texts
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
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