Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
In my junk email folder, there are literally 67 messages from Alcoholics Anonymous. What..the fuck.
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He introduced me to his parents as the girl he made out with on Thursday night...
You were hugging the toilet and shouting "don't let fatty eat me" through the closed door.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
When you get a chance, you should call Nick. He REEAAAALLLLLY wants to hear you make chewbacca noises.
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Two old ladies openly mocked me this morning at drunk breakfast. Is it time to reevaluate my life choices?
Dude, he came to our house with a beer can in his hand dressed up in a chicken suit screaming, "free eggs!" then threw up and passed out in the front yard.
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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