Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
I am kinda proud of you, its like seeing my slutty baby take its first step
How many folks do you know who bring coke to a dinner party. Seriously.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
If I get there and all he has for my big valentines surprise is his body, I'm dumping his ass and posting his dirty pictures on a porn site so people can laugh at him.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
She unfriended me on Facebook after I responded to her long love note with #demtittesdoe. Jager is the goddamned devil.
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
She's just a lonely cunt and i hope she stays that way for the rest of her fucking life.
This seems like an over reaction to someone eating your fries.
i spent most of last night convincing myself that dan akroyd wasn't actually standing in my bathroom holding a dead chicken
Randomize
