some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
I appreciate the offer. Swallowing pride is much like swallowing cum, difficult and unpleasant
After I threw him out he walked down the street peeing in stride. I almost wanted to let him back in.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm also 3/4 on the frats. Its like my goal of traveling to all 7 continents, but different somehow and a lot less morally sound.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
I'm an approx 70% certain someone switched my UV Blue for Windex - just as volatile as you might think.
It's not above me to sleep with him solely for his authentic budweiser shirt
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
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