Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
he went up stairs with nothing on but calvin klein's and an eskimo hat, said hi to her dad, got a doughnut, and left like it was an everyday thing
Power went out. She lit a candle and gave me head. Made some pretty impressive candlelight cocksucking shadowpuppets. Must be what porn was like in olden times.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I have six new people in my phone that I don't remember adding. One of them is "Bourbon Yeah." Successful evening?
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
we didn't have sex though. because i have the will power of an ox.
Literally just took 6 shots in the shower..I’ve got this.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
So, I need to know. Why did you spraypaint your underwear gold?
Randomize
