last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
I'm pretty sure this city writes new vice laws specifically because of us.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Smoked a topless bowl this morning. For International Women's Day. Quite liberating.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
Pitting the remainder of the bottle against my hangover. I'm expecting an all out cage match for my soul and wellbeing.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Who else has a jello penis in their fridge?!
Randomize