I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
the day after is always just damage control
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
I think they called the cops after 15 minutes of you shaking their clothes line like the ultimate warrior and calling out hulk hogan
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I know I'm not the first to fuck in a park but i deserve props for doing it at 3pm. On a sunny day might I add.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
Masterbating to Tolstoy. You?
My boss asked me what was wrong today and I really wanted to tell her I woke up too late to smoke a bowl before coming in
Let me guess you did your hair instead? Has anyone told you about priorities?
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
ok, muffins say "love me", waffles say "fuck me", got it.
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