the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
i don't know at this point bringing the fog horn might be a good idea...
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
Sorry for eating those cheese fries out of your hands last night
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
"Shots" of grape juice. I fucking hate Utah soooo fucking much.
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
I drank enough to tranq a steed. You really missed out
It tasted better than Jesus's hair.
I know it's 10:30am but Finding Dory starts in an hour, and I have four points of molly. You down?
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