chris hansen is no longer pursuing child predators.let's celebrate
i'll bring the hard lemonade and lube
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
eye of the tiger was playing while i pooped... it totally helped.
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
They had a "who can aim further away from the toilet" contest. I'm now washing piss off my ceiling.
My corndog is like a popsicle of bread. A WHOLE. POPSICLE. OF BREAD.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
he asked if i wanted their team name to be " Amandas angels" or " Fuk budies" either way an intermural softball team of all my hook ups from spring semester is just depressing. convenient but depressing
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
I'm surprised I didn't lose anything last night. Except maybe my dignity but other than that we gucci.
I came in shy and timid. By the end of the night I hulked out broke two lamps, their coffee table, some plates, and still had sex.
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
Randomize
