she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Would it be a good deed to leave a 32 pack of bud light next to a bum sleeping in the park?
Pretty sure that molly fried my sinus infection away; i regret nothing
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
Whenever I'm hungover I try to stay in public as much as possible, hoping to be a cautionary tale to children. It's a public service, really.
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
How does a face ride mean we're back together?
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
Blacking out in the security line at the airport is not nearly as fun as blacking out in the lunch line at the dining hall.
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