talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
Never name a vibrator after ashton kutcher
holy crap !! There is a MIDGET FAMILY in one of my rooms today !
How much trouble would you get into if you were to stomp down the hallway while loudly saying 'Fe Fi Fo Fum...'
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
you were eating the carrots out of my guinea pig's cage and saying that you needed them more than they ever would.
You were hanging upside down on the subway with your feet in the stirrup handle bars. the children were amused.
these girls were driving down the road screaming "SHOT!!" out the windows and pelting potatoes at passerby.
i got hit in the ear.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Ugh did we play golf last night and did you by chance hit my head with a club or a ball?
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
When we missed a fist bump and simultaneously did the Rocket Power handshake I knew I was going to blow him.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Thanks for going with me today. It’s been a long time since I bought bra and panties because of a guy
It’s called “shopping for lingerie” and it’s one of the many exciting and sexy things that follow a divorce, along with sexting, sleepovers, and orgasms
But, our next lesson is picking up a younger guys at the bar!
Randomize
