Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(607): View more from New York

I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie

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(607): I had a dream last night that I was the one that killed Biggie http://tfl.nu/m38d

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(204): View more from Manitoba

It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.

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(204): It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker. http://tfl.nu/sreq

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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester.

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(267): My roommate found me crawling down the hallway as she was on her way to her morning class. Its time for a new semester. http://tfl.nu/b6od

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(650): View more from California

how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?

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(650): how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths? http://tfl.nu/djnw

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(701): View more from North Dakota

There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops

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(701): There are some college kids out at 4 in the morning dragging each other on a sled behind a bike. its too entertaining to call the cops http://tfl.nu/5t7t

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(703): View more from Virginia

bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day

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(703): bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day http://tfl.nu/098u

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks.

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(724): Nope we're in the ER. He lit himself on fire trying to impress another girl with magic tricks. http://tfl.nu/a8rg

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(650): View more from California

party gras won. party gras always wins.

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(650): party gras won. party gras always wins. http://tfl.nu/yzh5

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(201): View more from New Jersey

i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her

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(201): i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her http://tfl.nu/006u

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(203): View more from Connecticut

Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.

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(203): Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder. http://tfl.nu/zfbm

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(515): View more from Iowa

he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.

(1-515): View more from Iowa

and you said he wasn't worth calling.

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(515): he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer. (1-515): and you said he wasn't worth calling. http://tfl.nu/rvi9

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(256): View more from Alabama

2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts

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(256): 2000 dollars has been put in for bail money. Also we're signing contracts http://tfl.nu/zqnp

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius.

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(+44): next photo in the 'cherished memories' series- Jess's bed. Note the vomit actually UNDER the pillows. shes a genius. http://tfl.nu/19nm

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(303): View more from Colorado

Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much.

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(303): Rosemary is literally sitting on the ground holding on to the rug because she thinks she is going to fall if she lets go. We smoked way too much. http://tfl.nu/2s2x

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(804): View more from Virginia

I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for

(804): View more from Virginia

Oh my god she just threw up on her dog

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(804): I just stuck my fingers down her throat so she could puke. I mean what are friends for (804): Oh my god she just threw up on her dog http://tfl.nu/gcjh

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