dude..why do i always have to pick up the kitty litter after you drink?
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
My dad just knocked on my door and told me that my vibrator was too loud
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As your boss, I feel obligated to tell you that turning our management meeting into a kegger may just be the best idea you've given me yet.
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
He's got a wife and three kids but I'm into being that mistake.
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
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