did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I'm making a conscious effort to limit my spending at the bars...i wrote "FOR CAB ONLY" on a $20 last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently I did my philosophy paper last night. It's not bad either.
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
Now accepting hypotheses about how i managed to get a bruise between my boobs....
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please. Last time I saw him I awkwardly pulled his rat tail until it got too weird
My phone saved "first signs of pregnancy" as a most visited search.
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I didn't want dick. I wanted spaghetti.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize