but really, i care about skinny girls as much as michael vick cares about rotweilers
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
You disinfected one of his friends, buttered the jeans of the other one. And you poured every liquid you could reach on the floor, including cooking oil and green tea. It wasnt a great first impression
It was smashing those cupcakes into my face that did it. Junk food and I don't mix.
this is why ugly people need low self esteem. it stops them from doing shit like this.
Posh spice and Baby spice both in one night. Fantasy complete. God bless halloween.
I wasn't half as drunk as u but u were saying u were a "worm" and u tried to slither out of my grasp
I'm almost too old to be on The Real World but feel like I'm too young to be on The Bachelor and I'm just really confused with my place in life.
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Remember when we tried to have fun last time..? I got put in a choke hold and you woke up in some ones car.
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
Randomize