there are definitely too many half naked pictures of me out there for me to ever be famous.
Yeah I'm pretty much like lane on gilmore girls except my mom doesn't look so mean all the time.
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
just looked up how to break up with someone nicely on google. glad to know im not the only one who looks up this shit.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
just woke up to find an unpeeled banana, with a condom on, halfway into my vagina. this better not be you trying to be funny
I'm cleaning my bathroom. That being said I found a klonopin and dropped it and stepped on it. Floor is clean im gonna snort it.
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I don't know, I think it's at least a minor achievement when you can light up with the guy who took your virginity and act like you didn't have and incredibly awkward sexual experience together
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
He goes from zero to fucking up in 2.4 drinks. Like the sportscar of bad decision making.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
omg last night while walking home from your house I stole a seatless bike and carried it into my next door neighbors kitchen.. we just looked It up online it's an antique and worth $500 dollars
Randomize
