So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
my vag is so smooth its legendary
Stop bringing these fucking whores home with you. If I have to fight over the remote with a bleach blonde idiot wanting to watch the hills reruns one more time I'm pissing in your shampoo.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
i just burped and it tasted like condom. please tell me i wasn't lame and made that guy wear one for a bj last night.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Unless you can cure my hangover with your penis I'm not interested.
i think that after ALREADY drinking that much, the tube shots may have been a bad idea.. i mean afterall, i did wake up and find my cell phone IN the bonfire the next morning.
Get dressed, I have 50$ and you need a new beer pong table since we threw yours off the 8th floor last night.
I am going to borrow your water/shock proof video camera for St. Pattys day so that if wake up next to the highway again I know why.
Ok but I hold the right to any footage of you getting slapped, puking, anything with body shots, and allowed to make a montage of it to put on youtube.
I am making pancakes and watching Spongebob Squarepants. My life is a waste of youth.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
Get off the floor, put away the cookie dough, get ur shit together Scott.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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