I like the name aiden. he likes stella. I told him they're coming out of my vagina, and I will name them what I damn well please. Stella goes.
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
she smelled like a LAN party
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we dont know what were doing after yet. first up we have 90 beers and a party kit and fun hats.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Maybe STDs were invented to keep stupid people from having kids.
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
I woke up to a full mcdonalds meal being shoved in my face. Mom mustve noticed the empty tequila bottle. I love family.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
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