i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
This baby is an asshole
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
I just gave them my two week notice. Now is the perfect time to fuck my boss's son
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
Randomize
