And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
I love that the power of margaritas brought us back together.
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
Girl we've come a long way since our first Brazilian wax
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
How was the party
I came home with only one shoe, a t shirt tied around my shoeless foot and I was covered in motor oil. Oh and my shorts were inside out. So you tell me
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
Did I turn a man straight...??
Yes!
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
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