i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
shes got that 'its my party i can do meth if i want to' mentality. i like that.
I remember convincing the limo driver to smoke with us and if he did I would name my first son after him.
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
Yeah, surprised you made it on time this morning. Remarkable, considering 2 hours ago you were pretending to be talking window curtains.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
He smells like sex and magic. I’m already naming our children
Maybe you should talk to him first
I didn't have any choice but to cuddle you. Your hair was stuck on my nipple piercing.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize