No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
she wouldn't stop crying, so we sang her to sleep. i'm guessing you will find her in the same position by the toilet in the morning. night.
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
You are right. The scrape marks on her ass are from her breaking the doggy door by crawling through it.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Just traded a sandwich for anxiety drugs outside the club. I fuckin' LOVE this place.
SUNS OUT COOCHY OUT
Yeah she let me pull the goalie and wear my USA flag like a cape since it was the first day of the world cup
I heard you ran into my sister lastnight. Do you remember making out with her and slapping my uncle?
so i just met a former male stripper who has a lion king tattoo. new BFF? i think yes
You know its an epic night when omar the garbage man gives you a ride home at 6 in the morning.
You almost got us killed.
YOU’RE WELCOME FOR NAVIGATING YOU TO A ONCE IN A LIFETIME EXPERIENCE.
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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