Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
fyi, if youre wondering if offering a female police officer sexual favors will get you out of a ticket, the answer is no.
Kegger tonight. 10pm. $5 coverfor unlimited booze. Proceeds benefit nuns from Uganda. Bring friends. No shit.
1.) where are you? 2.) you making meatballs? 3.) Meatballs for sex?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
Its... i dont even know. theres lots of rap music and i cant find my shoes
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Stripper just cleaned my glasses with her nipple...
Once you jizz in someones hat, you cant take it back.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
I am real keen for none of this to be taken out of context so let’s just shut it down right now
Randomize