have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
Does saving a line for myself for the morning so I don't seem hungover at work count as responsibility?
Adult decisions.
I just really need to get the matching flask to go with my pill box. Is this another step towards rock bottom?
He may only be 25% black, but after that sexual experience I am 100% never going back.
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
If the Cards come back I will fly to St Louis and shit in a very public place.
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
think before you get married my friend it's my birthday and just got done jacking off
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
Slept with the roommate last night and also discovered that she believes in eugenics. I may need to slow down my drinking
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
I flashed my boobs, shit my pants, and kissed the wrong twin. I'm on a roll you don't want in on.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
