I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
I just found out my birth date is Pick Your Poison Day. Goodbye, conscience, forever. I was born to live like this.
all i wanted was to be slutty. now i'm meeting him for drinks tomorrow because he woke up before i had a chance to sneak out and was too polite to say no
my night ended with a pity blow in a racecar bed
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
Nothing $200 worth of strippers and spicy fried chicken couldn't fix.
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
I survive off of bourbon and the tears of others only
Uhh I just had to break up with a guy who I didn't even know I was dating...
I let him use my phone and now I keep getting gay cruise ads, I guess he forgot to mention something.
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
So you completely disappeared from my memory last night at about my 15th Jager bomb. But only you. No one else.
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
I just got out of the shower and I feel like I just washed off 10 lbs of bad decisions...
Randomize
