The things that come out of my body both amaze and disturb me.
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
He told me his mother taught him that move. What the hell do I say to that?
When they saw it was the 7th inning of the baseball game one took off running for the beer stand while his friend is yelling "BUY THE KEG"!
I sent him an 18 page sext. He's going to have a good morning.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
I got turned off after he said, "i can see us in the future...me, you, and a back yard full of alpacas."
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
His dick is magical but I don't want to die in this blizzard do you see my dilemma
She used a candle as a shot glass.. A FUCKING CANDLE BRO!!
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