the real housewives of new jersey finale is tonight. it makes me wish we had pot.
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
went to library to start paper due tomorrow & took those orange addys u gave. now realizing they were ur xanax. completely fucked and going to fail, but calmly at peace with the situation.
Is it illegal to masterbate in an airport?
It's spring break, I'm sure it's ok.
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
Well, on the plus side, the hospital gave me a shirt that says "Makes a bad ass look good"
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Hot date tonight for the first time in months and I just cut my dick shaving. PRAY FOR ME.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
I HATE BEING THIS HIGH FML IT'S LIKE I'M MAKING UP FOR ALL THE 4:20S I DIDNT DO ALL AT ONCE
Randomize