I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
It's that time of the week again where I begin to ponder life's great questions like, "What will my pathetic excuse for a future look like?" and "Why tacos?"
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
The only reason I know his name is because we wrote marriage vows in orange crayon on the back of a Walmart receipt.
Totally thought something squeezed my boob. Then I remembered I was wearing a bra. Isn't weed great?
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
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