honey bunches of taint.
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I'm going to show my kids 2 girls 1 cup just to scare them away from porn
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
I just want to hook up with Ed Sheeran. Why does it have to be so difficult?
His wife just cheated on him for the third time. I'm his first extra-marital fling, that makes it ok, right? You know to keep karma balanced in the universe
Your logic is flawless...
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
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