Walk of Shame. In a state park.
don't tell me I don't love her. i once slept with my girlfriends therapist, just to find out if she was cheating on me.
Does it make me a prostitute if I accepted a Life House concert ticket for giving this guy head?
No. It just means your good at giving head.
Food Network. Taking bong rips everytime we want to eat. BOBBY FLAY.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
If you're in the liquor store 5 minutes before close, and you have to ask the cashier for a coin to flip to make a life decision because "vodka takes you to a bad place," you need to reevaluate your life.
did the fire alarm go off at the party last night I kind of remember a fire alarm noise
omg omg i ripped it out of the ceiling omg
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Well, maybe we can talk about it over a drink and some crushed up vicodin.
I faked more orgasms with him then ever should be allowed for someone this pretty.
Who suggested the eggnog wet t-shirt contest last night like whose idea was that
Speaking
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
Randomize
