your head's too prwtty to be stuck in the books
Making the executive decision for drunk you to not sleep in the lofted bed that has no ladder
My mom made me chili for when I get home from the bar. Those are the standards I expect you to live up to
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
My dad slapped my ass the other day and say I was "doing the family name good". I feel...proud
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I don't need this shit right now. I just woke up covered in pistachios
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
Randomize
