I'm torn. Shes everything I ever wanted, but I just cant get past the story about having drunken sex with her dog in high school.
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i need you to recap everything for me beyond "i think i'm gonna try vodka-pong"
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
I think our camping neighbours like us. We're the drunk girls trying to chop firewood with no pants on at 3 in the afternoon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
This is stupid. I am not getting knocked up from fucking in his backseat behind a starbucks. I refuse.
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Apparently when cookies are around I think of myself as a puppy and reward myself for everything #WhoIsAGoodBoy
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