and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
vicodin is the reason why I believe in magic
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Had a dream I was a monkey and smoked pot out of a bong made out of a tree
I called her new haircut "lesbian progressive" and now she's upset
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
Well on the bright side, I only need a sophomore to complete the fuck-a-guy-from-every-year-challenge.
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Some days you just pee in a stairwell and go home.
He showed up at my front door with Plan B and a rose...
Well... I got her number now... I think she is a dish best served drunk
I better get weekly incoherent text messages or I will assume something is wrong.
I'm glad I date someone who likes the simple things. Sex, kittens, and McDonald's.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
Randomize