after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
25 Disturbing Facts That Will Make You Question Everything
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
He would only do it doggy style. The "he's probably gay" debate rages on...
31 People Admit To Nasty Things They Do On The Reg
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
I just remembered that the guy I slept with last night has "USDA PRIME" tattooed on his ass