the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
I'm not a pervert.. I just like to be naked...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
Also, I had a dream I had a ray gun and woke up holding my dick.
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
Didn't I tell you I have developed a shameless theory about farting anywhere and everywhere? I'm too pretty so no one suspects me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
I've taken a shot every five minutes for the past twenty. His valentines cupcakes are going to be a fucking delicious vodka induced mess. Thinking about putting vodka in this next batch. I'm the best girlfriend.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
My roommate walked in on my inserting a tampon. Somehow, I don't think this will be improving our relationship.
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
Randomize