he just stuck his car key in my belly button, made car starting noises and pretended like i was revving my engine?
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Pre-crushing the pills for tomorrow morning. This way I can sleep in an extra 10 minutes.
As i lay in bed, clutching my face, i'm starting to believe your dick in my eye story.
Let's just say my vagina is not superimpressed with the superintendent of schools.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
I just found out that my husband and I are Eskimo siblings. What in the actual fuck?!
i may or may not have triedto pee like a boy and then dipped cheese ino the olive oil
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
He also needs to focus on not being such a little bitch, but that's none of my business.
Did you get your nipples pierced? I felt something poking through my shirt earlier and I really didn't want to say anything in front of your grandma...
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
God I need to hump something, right now.
Who is naked dude in the kitchen?
Randomize
