Cuntadactyl. (n). A pre-historic dinosaur of Mandy-like features that is primarily identified by it's inability to play well with others and overall C-word demeanor. Physically, an unfortunate appearance.
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but my underwear and it was on backwards and my entire body is too sore to move...
Im glad someone is finally more of a drunken slut than I am.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
My bad man. I was at a strip club, and apparently it's like a big deal to take your phone out in one of those places.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
That falls under the "unwelcome penises" category. Also that's definitely a sentence I never thought I would say
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
I dont know. He's too private. After you fuck him find out his secrets.
She called me at 2am crying because her late night booty call moved out of state
Randomize