I cant believe you went over there and fucked her last night after everything you said
she invited me over to play the wii, it's not like i intended to
You KNEW her power was out...
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
On blowjobs: "If you decide to go there, you finish the job. No complaining." I don't care if it sounds like she's talking about Iraq, I'm in love.
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
dude I just realized something - girls return my clothes washed so in thought bringing girls home is like avoiding going to the laundramat
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
I just don't know what he sees in my vagina...and that scares me.
Aww. I feel like I need to kill a puppy just to make room in the world for how cute you are right now
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Randomize
