I'm really into asian looking animals
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
He just became a fan of Chelsea Handler on Facebook. WHY DO I ALWAYS PICK THE GAY ONE
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
well apparently i was just calling everyone cunts. then i awoke from my blackout to 3 very mad roommates who didn't bring a key out with them
I feel like Captain Morgan shit all over my hopes and dreams last night...
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Sorry I didn't call this morning. Ended up with a decorated war veteran last night who besides finding the enemy, KNEW where the fuck my G spot was. He gets a medal in my book!
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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