ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
I mean he's a cool ass guy, but he's genuinely in love with a fat chick. I just can't take him seriously as a person.
We stopped midfuck cuz a guy was walking his dog. Who the fuck walks their dog in the dorm parking structure at 3am!?
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I think my body is literally trying to get me to reproduce. "fuck someone! Anyone!" - my body
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
Hiding in a kitchen with no pants orange juice abs a pillow...please joun
I haye tequella
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
