i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
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You asked me to be the big spoon, when you passed out on the stairs
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
Also on a more serious note, what says pull my hair more: straight or soft curls?
I knew I fucked up when I woke up with the meat scissors in my hand.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
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the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'