you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
I just took the soap out of the bathroom and hid it... this way I could see if she would say anything. you know, to see how clean she was
I'm not upset because i like you. I'm upset because I can't use you for the sex anymore.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Thats stupid. Your future is a life of less pay for the same work. Free drinks is how capitalism reimburses women for its inequality. & youre not even taking it!
The cops just showed up and arrested her. It's our 2nd date. Do I have to hang out her with her 3 kids until she makes bail or can I leave?
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
sooo trippy being back in town after 5 years. if you had asked me in high school who would be future coke heads, i would have been way off
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
Did you really eat 10 ice cream cones today?
It was tough but I powered through it.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Once upon a time I threw up in my own hands last night.
Just so you know, I choose to answer your bootytext tonight because it was the most creative.
Randomize
