Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
The last mom I slept with was the worst lay ever. Imagine fucking a hairy wet pillow for 60 minutes. Good luck with your milf. I was joking about the Susan Boyle comment btw.
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
Nothing says "I Love you" like my dick in a pizza box
Have I showed you the picture of my vagina with a little bang flag coming out of it?
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
Is Oprah even human
I CAN SPEAK THE LANGUAGE OF THE ANIMES.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
You don't know the capacity of my vagina
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
He held my hair while I gave him a blow job. Now that's teamwork.
Randomize