turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Boy did I ever crash and burn on the pickled egg pick up line.
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
You came on the chandelier from the first floor.. Of course were allowed back
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
Note to self; if you can light it on fire, you probs shouldn't drink it
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Randomize
