Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
my knee is completely bruised from kneesliding into the bowling ball. bowling for creativity points was a win
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
Woke up this morning naked, wrapped in a bath mat with a wad of singles on the table. I'm calling it a win.
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
