Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
Woke up under the lifeguard stand sleeping next to mitch our homeless friend. I bartered a summer wardrobe for his last 5 dollar to buy a bfast sandwich. Bring clothes
I can't in good conscience help you bag a Catholic girl who isn't at least a 7.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
10/10 would definitely still fuck you dressed as squirrel
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
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